The life of a millionaire of who became broke but where are his friends from the good old days
By Williams Patrick Praise
The fall from grace
isn't usually a cinematic explosion. For Elias Thorne, it was a silent,
agonizing leak. One day you’re checking the vintage of a Bordeaux that costs
more than a sedan; the next, you’re checking the lint in your pockets for
enough coins to buy a bus pass.
Elias was the
"Golden Boy" of the tech-boom era. By thirty-two, he had liquidated a
logistics startup for a cool $24 million. He lived life at a terminal
velocity that most people only see through a filtered lens. But as the saying
goes, the higher the pedestal, the harder the pavement. Today, Elias sits in a
cramped studio apartment that smells faintly of old radiator steam and damp
cardboard. The view isn't of the city skyline anymore; it’s of a brick wall and
a dumpster. But the most striking thing isn't the loss of his wealth—it’s the
deafening silence of his phone.
The Season of Plenty:
The "Friends" of $24 Million
The Entourage: There was Marcus, who always knew which underground club was peaking.
The Beneficiaries: There was Sarah, whose "art gallery" Elias funded to the tune of six figures.
The Tag-alongs: A dozen others who never seemed to have their wallets when the check arrived—not that Elias cared. He enjoyed being the provider.
To Elias, spending money on them was an investment in loyalty. He flew them to Ibiza; he covered their rent when they were "between projects"; he was the primary donor to their dreams. He thought he was building a fortress of friendship. In reality, he was just hosting a very expensive, very long party.
The Crash: When the Well Ran Dry
The downfall was a perfect storm of bad reinvestments, a messy lawsuit, and a lifestyle that assumed the tap would never be turned off. Within eighteen months, the luxury cars were repossessed. The penthouse was foreclosed. The "Golden Boy" was tarnished. As the zeros disappeared from his bank account, a strange phenomenon occurred. His "friends" began to develop a collective case of amnesia.
The Slow Fade: At first, the texts just took longer to answer. "Hey man, so sorry, just saw this! Super busy with work, let’s grab coffee soon." (The coffee never happened).
The "Busy" Signal: When Elias reached out to Marcus—the man whose debt he’d cleared twice—Marcus suddenly had a "family emergency" every time Elias asked for a lead on a job.
The Ghosting: Within six months of his bankruptcy filing, 90% of his contact list had effectively vanished. Elias realized a bitter truth: He wasn't their friend; he was their benefactor. When the benefit ended, so did the friendship.
Where are they now?
Elias eventually stopped calling. He spent a year in a deep depression, watching his former inner circle on social media. They were still at the same clubs, still drinking the same Bordeaux—but now they were clustered around a new guy with a new startup. They didn't hate Elias. They simply had no use for him. He was a broken vending machine; no matter how hard they pushed the buttons, nothing came out. So, they moved to the next machine.
Moral Lessons from the Bottom of the Barrel
Elias’s story is a modern-day parable. While his journey was painful, he emerged with a perspective that no amount of venture capital could buy. Here are the hard-won lessons from a man who lost it all:
1. Transactional Loyalty is Not Love
If your value to someone is based on what you provide rather than who you are, you aren't in a relationship; you're in a contract. If you are always the one paying, you are unknowingly filtering out people who value you for your character.
2. Wealth is a Mask
Money has a funny way of hiding people's true intentions. It’s easy to be "supportive" and "kind" when there are perks involved. Poverty, however, is a master clarifier. It acts as a sieve, letting the sand fall through while keeping the few gold nuggets behind.
3. True Friends Show Up in the "Neutral"
Elias realized his mistake: he never tested his friendships in the "neutral" zone. He always accelerated them with money. A true friend is someone who is happy to sit on a park bench with you and talk for three hours without a single dollar being spent.
4. Your Worth is Not Your Net Worth
The most dangerous part of Elias’s journey was that he believed his own hype. He thought he was special because he was rich. When the money left, he felt like a ghost. The biggest lesson? Build a soul and a character that you’d be proud of even if you were wearing a rag.
The Silver Lining
Today, Elias works as a mid-level manager at a logistics firm. He’s not a millionaire, but he’s solvent. More importantly, he has three friends. One is a guy he met at a public library while he was using their free Wi-Fi to hunt for jobs. Another is a former colleague who was the only person to offer him a couch to sleep on when the penthouse doors locked. They don't want his money—partly because he doesn't have much, but mostly because they actually like his jokes and his resilience. Elias Thorne is an ex-millionaire, but he’s finally a rich man.
To help you identify those who are with you for the right reasons, it’s important to recognize the psychological dynamics of "Fair-Weather Friendship." Elias missed these signs because the high of the lifestyle acted as a distraction. Here are the red flags and psychological shifts Elias experienced, broken down so you can safeguard your own circle:
The Anatomy of a Parasitic Relationship In psychology, many of the people surrounding Elias were likely "narcissistic supply" seekers. They didn't see Elias as a person, but as a gateway to a lifestyle. When you are the one "up" in life, look for these three subtle markers:
1. The "Yes-Man" Echo Chamber
True friends will tell you when you’re making a mistake. Elias’s entourage celebrated every bad investment and every erratic decision because they didn't want to jeopardize their access to his bank account. The Test: If you ask for a critical opinion and they only give you praise, they aren't looking out for you; they are protecting their seat at the table.
2. The Absence of Reciprocity in "Small Things"
You might be the one with the money, but friendship is measured in effort, not dollars. The Red Flag: Did they check on Elias when he was sick? Did they remember his birthday without a party being involved? If the effort only flows one way—from your wallet—the relationship is a transaction.
3. The "Us vs. Them" Mentality
Elias’s friends often isolated him from his old, "boring" friends from before he was rich. They created an elite bubble that made him feel like he only belonged with them. This is a classic tactic to ensure the benefactor stays tethered to the group that strokes his ego.
The diagram below illustrates how a crisis (like losing wealth) acts as a filter for your social network.
How to Build a "Recession-Proof" Social Circle
If you want to ensure your friends stay when the money goes, you have to change how you build connections.
Practice "Low-Cost" Bonding: Regularly engage in activities that cost $0. If someone loses interest in a hike or a conversation over coffee because there’s no VIP booth involved, let them go.
Observe Resilience: Pay attention to how your friends treat people who have nothing. How do they treat the waiter? How do they talk about people who have failed? This is a preview of how they will treat you if your luck turns.
Be Vulnerable Early: Don't just share your wins. Share your anxieties and your "small" losses. People who are there for the money will find your vulnerability "killing the vibe." People who care will lean in.
Elias lost $24 million, but he gained a "B.S. Detector" that is now worth far more. He learned that the only people worth having at your table are the ones who would be happy to share a crust of bread with you on the floor.
It takes a certain level of emotional courage to look at your social circle objectively. Elias didn’t do this until he was forced to, but you can do it while you’re still "up."
The goal isn't to become cynical; it's to become discerning. Use this Friendship Audit to categorize your relationships and identify where your energy is being truly reciprocated.
The Friendship Audit Checklist
Evaluate your closest connections against these four pillars of "Recession-Proof" friendship.
1. The Crisis Response (Hypothetical or Past)
If I lost my main source of income tomorrow, would this person still reach out within a week just to check on my mental state?
Have they ever supported me during a non-financial "low" (a breakup, a health scare, or a loss)?
2. Do they offer help that requires time (the most valuable currency) rather than just asking for things that require money?
2. The Power Balance
Can I say "no" to their requests without feeling a shift in the "vibe" or receiving a guilt trip?
Do our conversations have a 50/50 split of listening and talking, or am I just an audience for their life?
Do they ever pick up the tab for small things (coffee, parking, a snack) to show they aren't just there for a free ride?
3. The "Vulnerability" Metric
Do I feel comfortable telling this person I’m struggling, or do I feel I have to keep up an image of "success" to keep them interested? Do they share their own failures with me, or is our relationship strictly a "highlight reel"?
4. The Moral Compass
How do they speak about friends who have fallen on hard times? (If
they mock them or call them "losers," they will say the same about
you). Do they celebrate my wins without a hint of envy or an immediate
"ask" for a favor?
Mapping Your Social
Landscape
Visualizing where
people sit in your life can help you decide where to invest your heart. Not
everyone needs to be a "Tier 1" friend, but you need to know who is
who.
The Inner Circle
(The "Floor" Friends): These are the people Elias has now. They
care about your character. If you were on the floor, they’d sit there with you.
The Middle Circle
(Social/Activity Friends): You enjoy their company at dinner or the gym.
It’s okay if these relationships are a bit lighter, as long as you don't
mistake them for the Inner Circle.
The Outer Circle
(Transactional/Network): These are people you do business with. The
relationship is based on mutual benefit. This is fine, as long as the
"benefit" is clear and honest.
The Final Lesson: Be
the Friend You Seek
Elias realized that
during his millionaire years, he was also a "transactional" friend.
He used his money to buy "coolness" and avoid being alone. To attract
authentic people, he had to start being authentic—showing his flaws, setting
boundaries, and valuing people for their spirit rather than their status.
Setting boundaries
doesn't have to be a confrontation; it’s actually an act of kindness to the
relationship. By being clear, you prevent the resentment that eventually
poisons a friendship.
If you feel someone is
beginning to view you as a "personal ATM" or a constant
"hook-up," use these scripts to pivot the dynamic.
Scenario 1: The
"Always Forgets Their Wallet" Friend
This is for the person
who assumes you’ll pick up the check because you "have it. The Script:
"Hey [Name], I've enjoyed treating us lately, but I'm trying to be more
intentional with my budget/finances right now. Let’s make sure we split the
bill today, or if you're tight on cash, we can just grab a coffee or go for a
walk instead."
Why it works: It
removes the "status" element. If they truly want to spend time with
you, they’ll be fine with the coffee. If they were there for the free meal,
they’ll suddenly be "too busy."
Scenario 2: The
"Constant Favor" Asker
This is for the friend
who only calls when they need a connection, a loan, or a professional favor.
The Script:
"I’d love to catch up with you as friends, but I’ve made a personal rule
to keep my [finances/professional favors] separate from my social life to keep
things simple. I value our friendship too much to let money or work get in the
middle of it. So, how have you actually been lately?"
Why it works:
It’s a "compliment sandwich." You’re valuing the friendship (the bun)
while firmly rejecting the transaction (the meat). It forces them to pivot to a
real conversation.
Scenario 3: The
"Vibe-Check" (Testing the Water)
If you aren't sure if
someone is a real friend, use this script to suggest a "low-stakes"
hang-out.
The Script:
"I'm feeling a bit burned out on the usual [expensive club/fancy
dinner/event] scene. Instead of going out this Friday, why don't you just swing
by the house? We can just hang out, listen to some music, and catch up
properly."
Why it works: It
strips away the "access" you provide. A true friend will appreciate
the low-pressure environment. A parasitic friend will find it
"boring" because there is no social currency to be gained.
The Golden Rule of
Boundaries
If a boundary ends
the friendship, the friendship was already over; you just hadn't realized it
yet. When Elias Thorne started saying "no," his phone stopped
ringing. He initially thought he was losing friends, but he eventually realized
he was just clearing the weeds. Once the weeds were gone, the flowers
had room to grow.
Moving Forward
You now have the story,
the audit, and the scripts. You are better equipped than Elias was at the
height of his wealth.
@WPPraise
wpp@mycomforter.org